January 21, 2012


Yesterday my oldest brother passed away. He died in his sleep of a heart attack and when we got the news we just could not believe it. We still don't. He was a USMC Veteran that served during Operation Desert Storm 1990-1995. Since he is a veteran, he will be receiving a honorary burial. All the arrangements are still in the works.

Loosing a sibling is not something I ever wanted to experience. Watching my father and my other brothers break down and cry hurts just as bad. This is especially hard on my father who lost his sister exactly 1 year ago and his mother exactly 6 months ago.

Pablo,went as "Guayo" for a reason I dont even know. That was just what we all called him. He was 44 years old and my father's first born out of 6 children.
He was my oldest brother. My fondest memory was when he used to live with us, my other two older brothers would spend the day watching movies and playing video games in his room and I was the little sister who wanted to part of the group. I would spend hours watching movies I had no interest in watching just to spend time with them all.
This picture pretty much sums up that portion of my life. From left to right, Guayo, Alan, Marvin when he was a baby, Carlos and me. Once Alan and Carlos got older, they stopped spending the weekend with us and Guayo moved away. All 5 of us where never together again at the same time. The closest was at my Aunt's funeral but I wasn't able to make it due to work. I have two other siblings, an older sister who is in her late 30s whom I met for the first time ever last year and another brother who is in his late 20s/early 30s. I have never met him in person, only know him through facebook but we do not speak.

Speaking to my brother Carlos today, we are still in shock. we feel like any moment now the phone will ring and they will say that everything is okay. It was just a false alarm and he'll be fine...
I am going to miss him dearly.

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